|
By Gavin
Hayward
Voëlkop is a place
people have strong feelings about. The men
who are regulars love it and go there frequently.
They enjoy the rustic, bushveld setting
near Brits, the naked men around (nudity
is optional), the opportunities for conversation
(and more) with like-minded guys which they
don't find in noisy, smoke-filled clubs,
the self-catering option, not having to
lock up or drive anywhere and thus no threat
of drunken driving prosecution. The birds.
The quiet of the bush.
Other people, when you say Voëlkop,
mutter tersely, "I never go there".
Maybe they don't like nudity, maybe they
prefer 5 star accommodation, the regular
rhythm of piped music. To each his own…
Voëlkop is a rustic resort, set in
the bushveld. It's part of its charm, or
it's what keeps you away! You can camp there
(in a tent), or for a bit more comfort,
hire one of their caravans. Then you may
have to use the communal ablution blocks!
(Could be fun!) There are another 13 wooden
units that sleep four, and have a toilet,
basin and fridge in them. Then you cook
on a fire, or use the restaurant. There
are three units which are quite luxurious,
two wooden and one a brick structure, and
these sleep 6 and include bathrooms and
fully equipped kitchens.
The accommodation is scattered around in
the bush, and you gain access to it via
Kweens Avenue. Directions are sometimes
given via Wankers Corner, and you may find
yourself in Butch Boulevard or Nora Way.
I don't think management choose your address
by your characteristics!
Of course, the centre-point of Voëlkop
is the pool, which has lounging lawns around
it, and the bar, restaurant and lapa entertainment
area. Nearby is the popular steamroom. The
sauna awaits the promised electrical connexion.
As do all the wires waitig I the chalets.
As does the row of patient fridges in the
lapa area. As do the owners Paul and Glenn
who for nearly ten years have functioned
with paraffin lamps and expensive generators.
They have some hilarious stories about coaching
city-slicker queens in the intricacies of
lighting and dousing a paraffin lamp!
The bar and restaurant are enchanting wooden
structures under thatch, quite open to the
elements, with decks shaded by thorn trees
and umbrellas.
The restaurant doesn't have a menu, but
it specializes in wors. Or Sarel, who runs
it, specializes in wors! Prices are very
reasonable. He's up early to do hearty breakfasts
on request, and for lunch and supper you
can buy the dish he prepares. You can purchase
a braai-pack or pie, or order pap &
sous. All these are advertised in the restaurant
beside an identical sign saying, "Cock-rings
for sale". So I guess there is a menu
at Voelkop…
Management's motto is, "Voëlkop,
where the customer always comes first!"
By Gavin
Hayward
At Voëlkop they're
now planning a grand turn-on party. The
sauna, the rows of electric fridges, the
Carmen curlers - they're all still waiting
for Eskom.
Said Glenn, one of the owners, "The
wires are in, but there's still no fire
in the wire."
Makolokwe, the neighbouring village, has
been electrified, but Glenn suspects someone
suffering from homophobia at Eskom is being
overly diligent and thus the delay in getting
electricity to Voëlkop. He has, for
instance, to sort out the sequencing of
numbers on little aluminium identification
plaques affixed to the poles before the
electricity can flow…
Electricity will bring Voëlkop into
the 21st century, with access to e-mail
and far greater convenience, but some will
lament the passing of the paraffin-lamp
era at this rural clothing-optional resort
near Brits in North West Province, the charm
of the shadows, the beauty of the quiet.
Not so Glenn's partner Paul who laments,
"My Carmen curlers have been waiting
so long for electricity to arrive, I'll
have no hair to put them in when it finally
gets here!"
Early in September, Voëlkop held their
own Gay Games. Four teams competed for the
Penis King Floating Trophy (correctly named
Die Tobie Viljoen Penis Koning Wisseltrofee
- see picture). Events included mealie swaai,
pole crawl and mincing.
The Games were centred around Voëlkop's
focal pool - for pole crawl, for instance,
the 18" PVC pipe stretched across the
pool was greased with Baby Oil, and participants
from opposing teams had to crawl over one
another (see pic) to opposite ends of the
pipe. Mincing involved positioning a coin
between the buttocks, running around the
pool and then squatting over a pot to deposit
the coin there.
Contesting teams had half an hour to come
up with a uniform and war-cry. In all the
ensuing hilarity, the Pink team emerged
the winners.
During summer you can look forward to an
Abba party, unique Christmas festivities,
and a drunken New Year among the acacia
tees. A particularly big event on 24 November
will be Voëlkop's 10th Birthday Bash.
For the occasion the day fee will be what
it was 10 years ago, and they will hold
occasional happy hours with liquor the price
of yesteryear.
On our way to Voëlkop we stopped as
usual at Hoogenot for a drink at the Explorer's
Pub. This summer, what must be the North
West's premier gay bar is open Friday and
Saturday evenings too. The day we were there
they were hosting a Bring & Braai, and
had converted one of the storerooms into
a darkroom for the event!
By Gavin
Hayward
Escom electricity finally
arrived at Voëlkop in October and with
it came some significant changes. The rows
of fridges that had waited so patiently
were at last able to cool down with installation.
The sauna could graduate from just being
a dark room next to the steamroom and also
contribute to the hot opportunities. The
owners and permanent residents are now able
to watch TV (someone has even installed
DSTV). They are also using food processors,
fans, microwaves, webcams and whatever other
gadgets and toys require electrical impulse.
Incongruously, the arrival
of electricity has also brought real quiet
to Voëlkop. The generator no longer
has to chug and splutter, drowning the twittering
of the birds. Formerly it was needed for
the bar fridges, the pool filter, the music
system…
City slickers, and others
who take for granted that power will flow
at the flip of a switch, don't fully realize
the trials of coping for years without electricity,
as Paul and Glenn, the owners of Voëlkop
have. Dealing with paraffin lamps on a daily
basis, refilling heavy gas cylinders regularly,
engaging with greasy, smelly generators,
stoking fires for hot water, fumbling and
stumbling about in the dark…..
Electricity has led to
even more pumping of human energy, too.
The buzz in the bar and the pool room complements
the activity in the steam area. In December,
the pool and lawns surrounding it were a
hive of chattering, giggling, kissing, cuddling
and general camp frolicking during the day.
I guess I missed one of the pics of the
century when I didn't have my camera with
me for a tattooed, hairy bear who was crocheting
among it all!!
The huts people can hire
at Voëlkop accommodate a total of at
least 80 people. Then there are twelve permanent
holiday chalets whose owners may have guests
with them, together with endless camping
facilities. In addition, New Year's Eve
is the one night of the year when you can
spend the night at Voëlkop without
having accommodation. Simple arithmetic
(and experience) tells how there can be
250 men there that night, and this New Year
was no exception. The crowd, dressed in
the theme of latex, sequins and feathers,
boogied through the night, enjoying a spectacular
fireworks display at the stroke of twelve.
Yes, men. Gay men. Voëlkop
is a clothing-optional gay bushveld resort
for men only. Probably unique in this country.
It allows the freedom to sit naked at the
bar even until late on balmy nights, to
smooch and cuddle in the restaurant, to
shriek uproariously with the shows in the
function room. And all the rest…
What's cuming up in the
next few months at Voëlkop? On 16 February
there's a Bushveld Braai. You go out into
the bush around the resort, get your wors
over some coals, and sleep under the stars.
(Of course, a portable bar goes with you!)
And if you're broke in February, there's
no charge for accommodation (only the day
rate of R20 per day) since you'll be in
your own sleeping bag on the ground. The
faint of heart can stay in the camp and
enjoy the amenities. Then on 9 March, there's
the Voëlkop Cabarette. Anyone can take
part in this fun talent show type of scene.
Do WHATEVER you want, solo or in a group.
Wooden Chalets range
in price from R100 to R200 per night, and
sleep from 2 to 6 guys. There is provision
for self catering and braais and a modest
restaurant for those who can't be bothered.
There are many misconceptions
about Voëlkop. They do NOT have long-drop
toilets. In fact all units have flushing
loo, basin and fridge at least, some with
a shower, and there is a communal bathroom
facility with several loos, showers and
basins with mirrors.
Voëlkop is a few
kilometers off the highway going to Sun
City. Take the Makolokwe turning and follow
signs to the cemetery!
A short way away from
both Jo'burg and Pretoria lies Voëlkop.
Travelling there will take you past familiar
landmarks en route to Sun City, finally
passing through a small rural settlement.
From the instant one sets foot on the farm,
it is clear that this is no London or Paris.
The overpowering awareness is of being in
the glorious Bushveld. This is reflected
in the amenities - ultimately everything
about Voëlkop is geared towards the
enjoyment of the outdoors. Accommodation
is provided in wooden bungalows, a kitchen
prepared meals which are served outdoors,
walks in the bush provide quiet time and
the bar area is dominated by the swimming
pool.
The sounds of Voëlkop
are, predominantly, laughter and birdsong.
Sit down, relax with a drink and chat with
owners Glenn and Paul, and you will feel
the bliss of a stress-free environment fill
your soul. Voëlkop is also a mere half
hour's drive from the Pilanesberg Game Reserve
and Sun City, which places excitement and
diversion on the options list.
If you are worried by
the prospect of taking off your clothes
- don't be. Your state of dress is fully
optional. If naked bliss is not your cup
of tea, the fact that those who go natural
really see and treat it as such, will make
your discomfort disappear.
Voëlkop is the ideal
weekend getaway where friendly faces and
banter are available in an atmosphere of
peace and tranquillity. For some, this has
proved so irresistible that they have rented
permanent space and spend every free moment
there. Voëlkop is guaranteed to be
better at removing the stress bags from
under your eyes than any amount of cucumber
slices.
- October 2000
|
